At this point in my tale I have come to the realization that I will not be successful at selling perfume in parking lots. The problem is that I still didn’t have a job so I went back to the trusty classifieds.
I applied at a locally owned pizzeria as a waitress. The interview was going very well. Unfortunately my boyfriend (now husband) had dropped me off for the interview and came to retrieve me a little early. Instead of waiting in the car like a good boy, he came into the office. That would have been fine except that he hadn’t shaved in two days and was dressed like a friggin lumberjack for some reason. I was embarrassed. It showed. I didn’t get the job.
I found yet another job in the classifieds. I remember walking into the office and thinking a la Scooby Doo, “Ruh Roh.” It was a room of about 30 people. Sound familiar? Each one of us had a short questionnaire to fill out. We then got called into a smaller office where we would be interviewed by a man who was very morbidly obese. I can’t remember what he asked me. I do remember that he wouldn’t tell me the name of the company or what the job was about.
Now, I’m pretty dumb, but I’m not THAT dumb. At this point I kind of figured that this was not a real job, but since I really didn’t have anything better to do that day, I decided to stay. For scientific purposes only.
Surprise, surprise! I made it to the second round of interviews. They rotund man came into the room with all of us “Winners!”, and started to tell us about the fabulous product that is Cutco knives. I sat there and watched him cut through cans and rope. He told us about the space age material the knives were forged from. It was all so very fascinating!
A little aside here: I had heard of Cutco knives before. A friend of mine had tried to sell some to my mom while I was away at college. My mom called up and told me how this whole thing worked. The rep. was to call everyone they’ve known their entire lives and set up a “practice” appointment. When the appointment is over they are to get a list of 10 people from the extremely impressed and (hopefully) new Cutco knife owner. The new prospects are called for appointments and so on, and so on….
After Chubby finishes his speech, we are taken back into his office one at a time to talk about our future with Cutco. All I remember saying to this guy is “NO, I don’t want to sell knives.” I said this over and over, and he tried and tried to get me to change my mind. As I was getting up to leave, he said something like “thanks for wasting my time.” I was SO MAD! I wasted HIS time! If he had told me it was Cutco on the phone, I would never have even shown up. But he KNEW that which is why he didn’t tell me in the first place.
I had applied to three different ads in the paper, and two of them were MLM’s! Would I ever find a normal job? Yes, I would. I wouldn’t come into contact with another MLM for 4 years. That’s when my mom decided to host a Mary Kay party.
To be continued….
Next: Part 3: What do you mean I’m not perky?
My Bologna Has A First Name said
Cutco knives! Thats one I’ve never heard of. Can’t wait for part 3… this is getting good.
neverpantyhose said
This is so good so far…can’t wait for the next installment!
ScrewU said
A similar thing happened to me when I went for an “interview”. I filled out a form and this perky girl came out and introduced herself. I followed her back behind the cubicles and saw a few rows of chairs. She sat me right in the front and told me the presentation would start soon. I was wondering to myself why this was happening but the blaring music made it hard to think.
A man came out and started drawing things on a white board. Showing us this amazing ‘opportunity’. I sat there long enough to find out it was about cleaning supplies and then I walked out. I didn’t even care that I was in the front row. I’m sure the rest of the people sitting there wished they were smart enough to leave too. I also ended up at a Kirby ‘interview’ one time. That was about the same. Amazing to me.
I have one thing to say to those people that place the ads….. SCREW U!!!!!!
Holy crap Batman said
Duh, do you really have a J-O-B or do you blog for a living? I’m cool either way.
Duh said
I’m a bum Batman. I live in a cardboard box behind a grocery store. All I have is my box and my laptop. (The grocery store is right next door to a Kinko’s. I illegally log onto their wireless internet service.) I spend my time foraging for food in the dumpsters conveniently located beside my box and blogging.
Turn ons: Soft fruit and slightly moldly bread
Turn offs: Putrified fruit and extremely moldy bread
Robin Loves Batman said
Wow you sure are easy aren’t ya? Bitches.
Robin Loves Batman said
What the heellll?
Screw You said
YOu are way too easy. You don’t ask for much do ya? Bitches.
Holler! said
Shit, since I’m a genius I put my comment on the wrong post (part 1). I had a run in with Cutco but they were going under the name of Vector Marketing. When I was telemarketing (it was legit, there was a paycheck involved) I called someone who put that down as his occupation! I flat out asked how he did it and turns out he was giving a $5 paring knife to each person that gave him at least 5 new names. Even as a broke high schooler I knew enough math to know that I wasn’t about to give $5 to each person I met! Where the hell did that common sense go when I was all MKed up?
holler, youre an idiot said
Alcas owns Vector marketing, and CutCo is a business run through Vector. Just wanted to add a few comments… a paring knife is not just five dollars- CutCo knives are the best. But, if you were into business and sales at all, you would know that by making the customer happy, you can get the customer to help you. By giving away free stuff, people give out names so that they can help somebody that they like.
At any rate, I sold for two summers. It has been the best job I’ve ever had..
Oh, and P.S. My personal best (in dollars, of course) was 2,500 bucks in ONE DAY.
-holla, holler
holler, youre an idiot said
Oh- and I make 50 percent of everything i sell. sweet.
Duh said
holler, youre an idiot,
Thanks for sharing! It doesn’t count if you sold $2500 worth of knives to your mom though.
Holla CDSS! said
Wow, some people like to share. Let’s see, it was over 10 years ago so totally over it. In the meantime, take a flying leap onto your showcase.
My Cat Came Back said
OK folks….so forgive my ignorance here, but are you saying that Cutco/Alcas is an MLM? I’m shocked actually if that’s what you’re saying. My mom swears by these knives and far as I know, I’ve never run into someone trying to peddle knives like they do MK!! Are we just starting a rumor here or is it kind of like the ole Kirby vacuum salesman? Now they are obnoxious for sure!!
Duh said
I don’t know how the company is structured as far as uplines and such, but Cutco does use the customer leads approach to selling. If someone you know tells the salesman your name, you will get a call offering to show you the Cutco products. The salesman comes to your home and shows you some products and then basically won’t leave until you give them names and numbers of friends and family.
I’ve heard that the knives are really nice. Honestly though, I’m not in the market to invest thousands in a knife set. I don’t care if it will last me forever. In my lifetime, I doubt I’ll spend more than a couple hundred dollars on knives. Tops.
My Cat Came Back said
yeah I hear ya. Now if they were craftsman tools…..that’s another story lol. What I like about them is you can take em back to Sears and you get brand new ones, no cost, no questions asked, guaranteed for life.
Strawberry Shortcake said
Cutco is a MLM that preys on college students. The product is over priced (for what it is) and inferior quality (for the price). Google if you are bored or here are 2 good links:
http://www.cookingforengineers.com/article/129/Chefs-Knives-Rated
http://www.vegsource.com/talk/pressure/messages/58097.html
ChineseAmbassador said
I thought Cutco was an MLM. Perhaps I’m wrong and they don’t have the pyramid/upline/recruiting schtick going on. But regardless, any business that has to sell its (EXPENSIVE) product by bullying people in their own homes is fishy.
I bet that “$2500 day” was the bulk of what she sold that summer. LOL And grandma doesn’t count, either.
The Therapist said
I buy mine via a catalog. No one comes to my house to sell them. I’ve never given them any names. I had a set of 8 steak knives – wonderful. I lost one in the move 7 years ago. I finally broke down to order a replacement about 2 years ago. It is lost now. So I am destined to only feed 7 people steak.
ChineseAmbassador said
if you can order the catalog with no salesperson involved, then it must not be MLM. Then why on earth would anyone sell them door-to-door if they are available in another format? If someone came door-to-door selling office supplies from Target, you know I would slam the door in their face. LOL
maybe this is like pampered chef?
Holla CDSS! said
The way I found out about them was by answering an ad in the paper. I drove an hour away, sat through about 40 minutes of hype and a 10 minute “personal interview”. I was a 17 year old high school senior but I knew what a home party was so this stuff, where they’re talking about earning trips to Europe and college points was way strange to me. It wasn’t until the personal interview that you were actually told how you would be working for them going door to door with your knives in a case. It was at my glamorous telemarketing job at MBNA that I came across the paring knife thing. I called a guy one night who had Vector Marketing down as his employer so I asked him what the deal was, he said that he gave every person who gave him names a $5 (at his cost) paring knife. Since I was only 17, my parents felt it was in my best interest to tell me “not a chance in hell will you go door to door in Wilmington selling knives”.
Anybody else know anything about the ones that all come around working towards college, savings bonds and a better life? Even the kid that sold me my paper a few weeks ago.
My Cat Came Back said
ugh!! I love when they try to sell me the Encyclopedia!! LOLOL – that really cracks me up. The internet has absolutely taken away the need for a big ole honkin’ set of books. It’s so 70’s
lol
I feel bad for those kids trying to “raise money for school” selling magazines, but heck, I can go get my kindling for my fire out there in them woods
Don’t need to spend money on magazines which I’ll never read anyway. I guess that’s the point is to make you “feel bad”. I always tell em, I need to save money for my own kid’s college 
They try, that’s for sure. Gotta give em credit for trying…..
Oh….and where I live, you guys will get a kick out of this…..there is a guy who drives around in his pick up truck with a freezer on the back selling these high priced meats out of the back. I got suckered ONE time!! I still can’t believe I spent almost 400.00 for about 6 boxes of meat. Luckily it was good and there was also some shrimp and lobster in there too, but certainly wasn’t worth 400.00. He promised that he would give me referrals for my business, so I guess I felt obligated to give him my business. I thought it was a good business investment, but ya know what, I never heard a peep out of his company to work with me and trust me, they could have certainly used my services…or so he said!!
Oh well, a sucker born every minute.
Thanks for the feedback on Cutco. I’m wondering if maybe when Cutco first started out, that they were headed in the MLM direction but maybe backed off? I’ll seriously have to ask my mom about it. Should be interesting
Strawberry Shortcake said
ChineseAmbassador, pamperedchef is a MLM or was your LOL referring to that?
What you do with your own money is not anyone’s business but your own. I don’t understand why you all don’t think Cutco is a MLM. They are. The individual seller may not do the actual recruiting. But why do you think they have to turn in names and addressed to the company? Also when you are ordering through a catalog, you are still ordering through someone. Someone (and you might not even know who) is getting commission off your sale.
http://www.fatwallet.com/forums/arcmessageview.php?catid=52&threadid=254231
http://radified.com/blog/archives/000055.html