Changes Update part 1

Written By: ScrewU

We showed you the beginning and here is the saga unfolding.  Hold on to your hats ladies… it’s a bumpy ride on Pink Truth

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Changes on Pink Truth

« on: Yesterday at 09:07 AM »

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Pink Truth has been around for just over a year, and in that time there have been many changes. We’ve changed the focus of our content. Members have come and gone. We’ve added things like chat and the discussion board.

As with any life situation, change is constant. I understand that people’s lives change, and that means some people come and others go. Our membership is constantly in flux as some people find what they need and never return. Others stick around for a while and help newer members work through MK detox, and for that we are grateful.

As the administrator of the site, there are times when difficult decisions have to be made. They are sometimes unpleasant. As with any life situation, not everyone will be happy with a particular decision. I have learned a lot about administrating a community like this, and it is not easy.

What I can tell you is that I do my best to be fair and honest, and do what’s in the best interest of the community as a whole. Does that mean that everyone agrees with my decisions? No. Does that mean my decisions are always right? No. But I have always been committed to learning and improving, and that is what I try to do each day.

Recently, one of our more active members was removed from the community due to an unfortunate series of events. I assure you that this member is well aware of the reasons for my actions, and that there was ample opportunity to correct the situation. Some have wondered why I didn’t make a public announcement about the situation. It’s simple. I didn’t want to create gossip about the situation or publicly embarrass her by discussing the details.

I understand that people were surprised and disappointed. I do appreciate those who came directly to me to ask about the situation. I want people to come to me when they have questions. No one else should speak on my behalf. If you want to know about something, you should ask me. There has been speculation about this incident that has lead to the distribution of misinformation, which disappoints me.

We have rules and expectations on Pink Truth, and those who have been removed from the community have violated those rules. From purposeful disruption of the community, to promotion of MLMs, to dishonest and duplicitous behavior… it is my responsibility as the administrator of the forum to act upon these things. I do my best to make the right decision about who stays and goes.

I am sorry for hurting anyone in the process, either the former members or current members. Please know that I try to make the right decisions and I do not always do so. I try. I am human. I make mistakes. For that, I am sorry.

I am thankful for the Mavens, who are helping me with keeping the community running and who are offering their wisdom to me as well. They are women who were willing and able to help other members of the community, and I thank them for their time and effort. I never would have imagined the time commitment in running a site like this, and I appreciate that they are willing to help.

Please understand that the Mavens aren’t some sort of secret society. They are simply a group of women who were called upon to help and they graciously accepted. Mavens aren’t loved any more or less than any other members. I simply needed help from a small group of women. As with the rest of the community, I expect that Mavens will come and go and their life changes dictate. I accept that, and I am just grateful for whatever our members are able to contribute.

Above all, I want Pink Truth to be a fun, informative, and safe place to hep women with MK issues. Please… come to me with your concerns and suggestions. I want the site to be fantastic and I don’t always succeed or do what is right. But I do know that my heart is in the right place and that my commitment to serve women hurt by MK continues. This is something that is very important to me personally, and something that I do not take lightly. I just want us to keep helping people and hope that if anyone has any concerns or suggestions, they feel they can come right to me with them.

Thank you to everyone who has contributed to Pink Truth in the past… the site is nothing without you and I am forever grateful that you were willing to share your knowledge and insights with the thousands of MK women who needed it.

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #1 on: Yesterday at 09:18 AM »

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You know, I do not envy the job you have to do here… or the fact that it bleeds over into your personal life.  I could totally understand if you shut down and walked away forever.   I came to PT looking for information, and eventually support.  I was lucky enough to find both here.  I certainly don’t NEED more info on MK now, but I appreciate it all the same.  I pass it along to others in hopes of helping them at least have good info while they are still in the fog, and to support them as they slowly come out.

For me, all I can say is that I am very very sad that it involved someone I consider a friend, and someone who I have a lot of respect for.  I don’t know the details, and I am ok with that.  She has been amazingly respectful and not shared the gory details of anything.  In fact, she was so respectful, that I wasn’t even aware what happened until I was teasing her via email for not being around PT!

I understand that people come and go.  I understand that with a bazillion (or close to it) people on this board now, there are going to be disagreements, misunderstandings and life changes.  Those are going to occur.  Some people will make up, some people will leave quietly, and others will go out screaming.  I accept that.  It’s just in this case, I wish it didn’t involve one of my favorite people here, and one of the people who really helped me work through both the emotions and the paperwork of returning things to MK.  I respect her a lot, and I am proud that she is still a friend, even if there has been the decision to leave.

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #2 on: Yesterday at 09:31 AM »

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Tracy, I think you do a great job of keeping the trolls and MLM promoters off of here (not that anyone involved in whatever happened is either of those). I have had experience before of running a place and it’s hard and very time consuming. Plus, you have got people who come to this board specifically to get information to slader you with and I have read some of what they write and what I found is that I saw no facts of what they say to back it up … at least the ones who claimed it didn’t seem to have any that I could see.

I do not know what happened in the incident and to be honest, I don’t want to know. As long as it didn’t concern me, it’s not my business. I agree with apple berry that with so many people posting here there will be disagreements and such but sometimes I do feel that people try to supress others opinions and feelings and I, myself, almost left the other day from PT because of that but I’m waiting for the “ignore” feature because it will be used. Cheesy  There are some great and wonderful people here that give lots of support to those who are hurting or angry, but just as any other place on the internet, there will be the ones who try to bully and dominate. In person, I will go toe-to-toe with someone like that but on the internet it’s not worth it. I think we all find times that we blurt out the wrong thing or have bitten our tongues (or would that be tied our fingers  Sarcastic ) I would just leave if I get that upset and I almost did.

I have to say Tracy, I think you have done a good job here and also I agree with apple berry, I would understand completely if you shut down today (but hope you don’t). I don’t know if this is coming out right but I feel as though, right now, being at PT, I am on the right side.  Hug

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #3 on: Yesterday at 10:08 AM »

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Well I could not agree more or say it better than AppleBerry or MSCorpbs. 

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #4 on: Yesterday at 10:30 AM »

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As with any life situation, change is constant.

most of the things the posters complain about is changes in mary kay…….and this is from tracy’s post here. i don’t get it….??

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #5 on: Yesterday at 10:34 AM »

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I think the complaint with MK is that the changes are costing consultants a lot of money. They’ve got obsolete inventory that they’ve spent thousands on, and now they’re supposed to spend more to stock the new inventory… the spending in MK never stops!

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #6 on: Yesterday at 11:25 AM »

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 Group Hug  Pink Truth Rocks

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My involvement with Mary Kay Cosmetics has come full circle. I used to help women get into the business; now I help them get out and recover their lives.

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #7 on: Yesterday at 11:42 AM »

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Tracy,

I have never been able to figure out how you keep up with this site and do such a good job.  I come for the laughs and as a replacement for my MK friends who turned out to be not my friends.   Cry

As a relative newbie let me offer my support. I have no idea who left and really don’t want to know.  Sometimes, I have to “bite back my fingertips” from typing something that may be not too nice.   Evil  As an Italian (can you say Mafia?) we hate to put anything in writing anyway   Too Funny

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #8 on: Yesterday at 12:29 PM »

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No need to apologize Tracy – you are doing a great job!   Clap   Group Hug

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #9 on: Yesterday at 01:13 PM »

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Tracy —
I have been on several really good discussion boards over the last 7 or so years.  I also acted as the admin. for a couple of them.  It is a very hard job and very time consuming.

No matter how clear the rules are there will be people who will break them.  And there will be situations not completely addressed by the rules.  I also believe it is impossible to try to have rules that would cover everything that can happen.  If you tried, the rules would be thousands of pages.  And still something would happen that wasn’t clearly addressed in the rules.  (That’s why we have a zillion laws and still need a Supreme Court.)
 Cheesy

Thanks for wanting to be as fair as possible.  But it is your board and your site, so imo whatever you decide IS fair. Someone has to make the hard decisions when unpleasantness arises.   We are guests here and no one is holding a gun to our head to be here.
 Purple

Thanks to you and the Mavens for all the time and work.

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #10 on: Yesterday at 01:22 PM »

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As someone who has been lurking for over a year before I got the guts to post…I have to say that I have really appreciated that fact that it has stayed a positive and helpful forum.  No deterioration of attitudes and discussions that would paint PT in a bad light.  I love the fact that Tracy is keeping in mind the well being of women in…and out…of Mary Kay.  I think you have done an amazing job on a site that has certainly grown into a time commitment of epic proportions.

Keep up the great work, the pink world needs you…and so do we!!!

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #11 on: Yesterday at 01:38 PM »

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I’ve been part of a few discussion boards myself and have to say this one is so well ran!  You do a great job Tracy and I know you don’t make snap decisions.  Thanks for a great board!

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #12 on: Yesterday at 02:38 PM »

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Thanks Tracy for giving us such a well organized place to communicate.  I really try to abide by the rules when posting because I know you’re wanting to portray a positive, yet informative (and factual) view of so many wrongs in MK.   I think the majority understands that,  and we do what we can to help you portray that image.  Pink Truth Rocks

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #13 on: Yesterday at 02:44 PM »

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You know, I keep thinking about this, and it really bugs me.  I don’t like the idea of feeling like I have to choose between a friend and a place where I get news.  I understand neither “side” has asked this of me, but, I still feel in the middle.  Seriously, would the local paper make me choose between getting the news and being friends with someone who subscribes to another paper??  That may be a stupid example, but as I said, I thought PT was a place to get news about MK that I certainly wasn’t getting from my SD.  It becomes a community when people form friendships.   

I was gone (busy) for a while, and missed the unfolding drama.  When I get back I find that I have a banned friend (and apparently more than one now).  I don’t pretend to know all of the details.  However, I think that part of the issue that is going on has to do with the fact that there wasn’t anything said.  People will always make up stories unless they know the truth.  It’s the secrecy about the whole thing, undercover of avoiding gossip, which bugs me.  That, and now the assumption that this person was a base troublemaker.

Maybe my mistake here was in forgetting why I came to PT in the first place, for information. I have a busy enough life that I wasn’t lonely, though I am social enough I always like making new friends.  Information was why I came though.  Information was why I kept coming back.  Information was why I kept reading even when I thought everyone was way too angry for my taste.

Or maybe my mistake was forgetting that “virtual” people are just that until you start to know them off of the computer. After all, you can be anything you want online, and that isn’t necessarily the person you are in “real” life.  I forget that life is like that, because I generally don’t have the desire to be a different person online/real life.
That being said, there is still a lot of info about MK here, and I doubt that will change.  That is why I stay.  There are a number of things that bug me too. I don’t like the Hate Mail, and I don’t like how there is this never ending bashing of people’s grammar/spelling (mostly because I am no longer in English or typing class, and I don’t want to care that much any longer).  I am also uncomfortable with the mass amounts of secrecy/censorship that seem to be needed based on all of the craziness and virtual blog wars (that I am only VERY recently becoming aware of).

I think I am going to take some time to sit back, and take some time off for a while. I’ll catch you all in a little while when I am done rolling this all around in my head.

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #14 on: Yesterday at 03:08 PM »

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AppleBerry, I am sorry you feel you need to choose at all.  Why?  Be friends with whomever you want. 

And if you have suggestions for improving the site, by all means share them. 

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Friends don’t let friends MLM.  Girlfriend

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #15 on: Yesterday at 03:37 PM »

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I’m glad you shared your concerns…

You do NOT have to choose between a friend and PT.

A public announcement would have been embarrassing to her. Not making a public announcement leaves things open for speculation, and that is apparently what is happening.

We have a large community, and people’s likes and choices will never all align. I would hope that people skip the parts they don’t like, and read and post on the parts they do. There are some who don’t like hate mail, others who love it. There are some who think my posts about the numbers in MK are boring, others who live for them. We all like different things about the site and I want a site that has something for everyone.

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #16 on: Yesterday at 03:39 PM »

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Apple- I have alot of the same feelings as you. My position on this is that I was not nor am I a part of the secret circles
( that I have also just became aware of ) therefore, I feel the dissention is not mine to own. I came to this forum and continue to come because I know what it did for me. I would like to simply continue to help other women who felt as I felt. I am part of many forums and have many virtual friends and all serve a different purpose in my life. I have “met” many people on this blog as well as others, but, I have never met any of them in person. Perhaps that is why it is easy to keep my focus. I do miss some of the members who encouraged me to be part of this blog when I first came here. They let me know it was okay to be and also picked me up when I was down. For that I am Thankful. I do not know the effort it takes to run a blog, nor do I want to. I do however believe in the purpose of this blog and I have seen the people it has helped.

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #17 on: Yesterday at 03:46 PM »

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Quote

I am also uncomfortable with the mass amounts of secrecy/censorship that seem to be needed based on all of the craziness and virtual blog wars (that I am only VERY recently becoming aware of).

I’m glad I don’t know about these either. I’ve seen a couple of places where people posted but I sure don’t want to post if I know there are problems. Never did get the whole purpose of board or blog wars and things anyway. 

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #18 on: Yesterday at 04:00 PM »

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If there are secret circles, I don’t know about them either. Someone want to invite me?  beer

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« Reply #19 on: Yesterday at 04:43 PM »

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I know nothing of what happened.  Don’t need to know.

I do not assume whoever was banned is a bad person or did something dreadful. It’s a message board — how bad could it have been?  I have had good friends banned from sites.  They are still my friends. 

Not mad at the board that banned them.  They broke the rules and knew they were risking being banned.

Boards need rules.  Boards without rules get nasty pretty quick.  People will have issues. They will break rules.  Someone has to decide what is over the line. 

It’s Tracy’s board.  Don’t be mad at her for having to make the tough decisions.  Someone has to and the decisions will always be unpopular with someone.  It’s not easy to moderate a board.

I think it is easier to enjoy a board if I remember that the board owner gets to make whatever decision they want. And I appreciate that this board is open to suggestions.

Every board I have ever seen has little groups that form.  They correspond on pm’s and emails.  It’s just what people do.  Ask any sociologist.  And it’s not just women who do it.  Men do, too.

any hoo — sorry there was some bit of a dustup

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #20 on: Yesterday at 05:00 PM »

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I am still sad  Cry  and confused Crazy! , but less so.  Thank you, Tracy, for your public explanation.   Group Hug

I guess I learned a hard lesson about discussion boards since this is the only one I’ve ever participated in.

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #21 on: Yesterday at 05:02 PM »

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Well if it makes you feel any better, I’ve never run a board before, so I’m learning too!

 Drink

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #22 on: Yesterday at 05:17 PM »

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I don’t know about the drama that went on either.  I don’t really need to know.  If ignorace is bliss, then I am rolling in bliss!

However, I have moderated a board in the past, which is why I probably won’t ever want to run my own blog!  Difficult decisions have to be made all the time.  I have come across boards that are unmoderated and believe me it ain’t pretty! 

I have found this board to be generally well run.  I knew the rules when I joined — every board that I have ever posted to has a list of rules  everyone has to abide by.  If I don’t like the rules, I don’t post on those boards period!  If the rules on boards change, and I don’t like the changes, I also leave.

Do I like everything that goes on here?  No, but I have yet to find a board or blog that is perfect.  I attribute that to the human condition.

Eve is right about little groups forming on boards.  In my years on this planet, I have come to realize that I won’t like everyone and not everyone will like me.  And that’s okay.

The one thing that I have realized on my time here is that even if we don’t all like each other, we still have one thing in common:  we (or people we know) have been hurt in MLM and we have banded together to help those who come to this board seeking information and support.

Michelle

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #23 on: Yesterday at 05:28 PM »

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Tracy…this site has been “maturing” for many months. It reflects the women who are on it. When bad language was used, you cleaned it up. When gossipy stuff was shared, you cleaned it up. When some of us suggested to not post names of “attackers”, You cleaned that up. Like a good attorney would do, your cross examination that exposed  the lies in earnings and success of some Directors who came here to chastise us, proved you we not going to let members be further abused by more lies from MK. I believe you have been true to your heart on this. This site has class, intelligence and wit. It used to be catty, and condescending. It reflected its newness and the venting of anger from hundreds of women free for the first time to let MK have it!  Now, they can see from reading others that they do not have to make the point to us, we know.

Women have an emotional flaw, in my opinion. We are frail in the “significance” department..thats why we fell for the praise and recognition. On this site, and others, women still fighting their insecurities will assume they are being mifted, or not appreciated, if they do not get the kind of response they were hoping for. Women with certain agendas, might feel a need to gain allies, or to be understood. We are sometimes silly imperfect humans…no? What we should never do, is jump to conclusions or make assumptions on partial information. Mary Kay should have taught us that. And we probably should make a commitment to being a class act in the way we communicate, and that decision to “click” the word “post”. That one thing alone will sever us from all the others. Learning to forgive is a virtue, and an even greater one, is to apply “grace” to any who have hurt you, or failed you. SInce none of us are perfect, shouldn’t we be able to look with forgiveness and grace to anyone
who has failed us? And shouldn’t we give the same?

You keep on fighting the fight Tracy. You live in the “penthouse”- not the gutter.

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #24 on: Yesterday at 05:31 PM »

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Quote from: apple berry on Yesterday at 02:44 PM

I don’t like how there is this never ending bashing of people’s grammar/spelling (mostly because I am no longer in English or typing class, and I don’t want to care that much any longer).

Wait, what? Grammar bashing?

WHERE?? I WANT TO PLAY TOO!!!

er… sorry.

I’m an English major by training and a horrible stickler for grammar and spelling, but I would never think to go around on some message board giving people crap for being less than perfect. (Oh my God! I’m not perfect either!)

The only time it’s acceptable to snark on people’s grammar is when they’re claiming that they’re smarter than you. In that case, go wild.  Evil

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #25 on: Yesterday at 05:33 PM »

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Quote from: raisinberry on Yesterday at 05:28 PM

Tracy…this site has been “maturing” for many months. It reflects the women who are on it. When bad language was used, you cleaned it up. When gossipy stuff was shared, you cleaned it up. When some of us suggested to not post names of “attackers”, You cleaned that up. Like a good attorney would do, your cross examination that exposed  the lies in earnings and success of some Directors who came here to chastise us, proved you we not going to let members be further abused by more lies from MK. I believe you have been true to your heart on this. This site has class, intelligence and wit. It used to be catty, and condescending. It reflected its newness and the venting of anger from hundreds of women free for the first time to let MK have it!  Now, they can see from reading others that they do not have to make the point to us, we know.

Women have an emotional flaw, in my opinion. We are frail in the “significance” department..thats why we fell for the praise and recognition. On this site, and others, women still fighting their insecurities will assume they are being mifted, or not appreciated, if they do not get the kind of response they were hoping for. Women with certain agendas, might feel a need to gain allies, or to be understood. We are sometimes silly imperfect humans…no? What we should never do, is jump to conclusions or make assumptions on partial information. Mary Kay should have taught us that. And we probably should make a commitment to being a class act in the way we communicate, and that decision to “click” the word “post”. That one thing alone will sever us from all the others. Learning to forgive is a virtue, and an even greater one, is to apply “grace” to any who have hurt you, or failed you. SInce none of us are perfect, shouldn’t we be able to look with forgiveness and grace to anyone
who has failed us? And shouldn’t we give the same?

You keep on fighting the fight Tracy. You live in the “penthouse”- not the gutter.
You have reminded me yet again why I like you so much and look forward to your posts.  When you have something to say,  I sure do listen.

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #26 on: Yesterday at 05:59 PM »

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I think what really sets PT apart is the class of our members, and their willingness to learn and understand. I think we all agree that communication on the internet is imperfect at best. Our written words many times do not communicate our hearts or our intent. I have been impressed over and over at the amount of grace our members give to one another and the amount of growth we have all done as individuals.  We have made so many strides on so many levels over the last year, and I am so proud to be a part of this forum. All credit to the members….

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #27 on: Today at 04:55 AM »

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I am too new here to even be able to realize who is gone. Sad

I, too, have moderated boards before, and it is not an easy job.  I applaud Tracy for doing such a good job. Yahoo

Every board needs rules – and some people break them.  That’s life.  It doesn’t mean they are horrible or evil – they just broke a rule. 

 Pink Truth Rocks

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #28 on: Today at 05:59 AM »

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I have to weigh in on this. I just do.  I’m not sure how to even put this but this is what is bothering me right now.  I understand completely when someone has to be banned because they are obviously here to insult us.  I have a very small forum and to date I’ve had a couple of people sign up who are just there to spam me or whatnot.  I banned them.  No problem.

The problem comes when someone is banned from this forum who has been an active, vocal and supportive member since this board was CREATED.  Now, obviously we do not know all the gory details and I agree, we don’t really need to know them per se.  I disagree however that we are to blindly accept the loss of this member.  ***** has been nothing but supportive on this board.  If she did things off-board that were off base and you guys could not work it out personally that is unfortunate but why deprive the people here of her presence?

I think because I do consider Happy a friend this has really hit me hard.  I do not understand it and I do not think banning is even handed or fair at the point at all, except in cases of people who register merely to spam here.  Can we NOT handle some debate?  Even from people who disagree with us?  I say let even those who disagree with us remain!  Create a thread just for this purpose.  Why not?  What are we so afraid of?  Maybe if we let people speak and hear them out then there would not BE anti PT blogs..yes?

In the case of banning our friends, though.  I just disagree…I just do.  We can’t survive if we live in fear like this.

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Re: Changes on Pink Truth

« Reply #29 on: Today at 06:18 AM »

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I apparently missed out on the unfolding drama as well and don’t really care unless it involved me (which it doesn’t). 

Tracy sent me karma the other day for my 1 year anniversay date on PT (Thanks, Tracy).  Wow!  I had no idea I had been on PT that long.  In this past year, I have seen everything from love and compassion to claws coming out.  I don’t read every item if it doesn’t pique my interest and I primarily just participate on the discussion board because I’m pretty much over my experiences with MK.  However, I do like to add my two cents from time to time to help those who need it. 

From somone who’s a 1-year veteran of PT,  I personally think Tracy has done a really good job of trying to keep the community “safe”.  It can’t be easy and I certainly wouldn’t want to be drawn into all the drama she’s been dragged into without choice.

 Pink Truth Rocks       

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